Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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