id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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