I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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