That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
