do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Even my vagina gasped.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
