Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
