we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
