Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I got inside last night via doggy door
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