i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
