woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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