either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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