dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
