You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
