ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
