I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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