Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Please, let me fuck your mom
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
