Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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