Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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