i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
