I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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