8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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