I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
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