I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
