dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Randomize