I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
