i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Quick, to the slutcave!
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
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