Jerry, you need to find god
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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