I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
