im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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