This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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