The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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