But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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