Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
