OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
