it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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