why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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