Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
