so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize
