She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i would punch a child for taco bell
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
