Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Randomize
