Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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