I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
