normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
