I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Randomize
