also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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