it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I think I won the penis lottery.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
