He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
ttyl tear gas
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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