I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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