hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
