Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Randomize
